“Don’t write about anything you haven’t processed first,” says Megan Macedo, our writing guru. Twenty-one days ago, when I began this blog challenge with Megan, I thought that picking "Processing" as a theme would be a natural to tie into my work as an Alexander Technique teacher. By choosing "Thought, Experience, Action" as the subtitle, I could neatly connect Experience with awareness, Thought with pausing (or inhibition) and Action with direction. Because of the prompts I was given to write on in the challenge, however, things got deeply personal very fast. Which was actually great. If I am working on processing, where else can I start but with my own life, my own experiences?
The days have flown as the writing flowed. Where I went is not where I thought I’d go, but I went there anyway. (That seems to be an apt metaphor for my life in general.) I have certainly experienced, sat with and acted on each of the situations I wrote about in this series. Some of them more than once, because habitual behavior dies hard. In last year’s series on the Power of Habit, I wrote an entire blog post on the idea of the spiral and how things come back around in our lives on different levels of intensity. I still believe that strongly, and now I can see how that spiral nature also applies to situations and memories I have previously processed.
The days have flown as the writing flowed. Where I went is not where I thought I’d go, but I went there anyway. (That seems to be an apt metaphor for my life in general.) I have certainly experienced, sat with and acted on each of the situations I wrote about in this series. Some of them more than once, because habitual behavior dies hard. In last year’s series on the Power of Habit, I wrote an entire blog post on the idea of the spiral and how things come back around in our lives on different levels of intensity. I still believe that strongly, and now I can see how that spiral nature also applies to situations and memories I have previously processed.
A group photo from our recent vacation in India. I came home from the trip and started the blog challenge 2 days later.
Things definitely come around again. For example, I recently “met my grandmother” on a 2-week vacation. In a small group, it’s kind of hard to avoid someone you take an instant dislike to, especially when you’re on vacation and you don’t want to think about stuff like this and you don’t even know why this person bothers you so much. Yet, she bothered me. In her simply being herself, I had my buttons pushed. I wish I could tell you that I took all the time I needed to process the “why” of this on the trip, but I didn’t. I needed to come home to realize that each time my grandmother’s personality came out in her, I wanted to flee. Then, I learned something significant as she shared with us post-trip what was going on at home for her. Oh, my. I softened my heart and I was able to see it all – as well as have an incredible amount of empathy for both of us. I wish I had been able to do this as we traveled, but better late than never. It will change our meetings from here on out for the better.
When I meet a new Alexander student for the first time, I consciously work on softening my heart. I need to listen with full presence, to tune into what they are saying aloud and what their bodies are saying for them. It turned out that a large part of my work in this series was softening for myself, for my inner wounded child. Through my writing, I was able to soften and listen to what she had to say before sharing it with you. I think the series became better when I stopped worrying about my theme and just starting writing, letting the memories and emotions flow. My hope is that I’ll be able to take what I’ve learned back to my work, to my Alexander Technique students. To help them listen for their inner children and how they manifest in our bodies as well as our minds. Thank you for listening to both of us on this journey.
When I meet a new Alexander student for the first time, I consciously work on softening my heart. I need to listen with full presence, to tune into what they are saying aloud and what their bodies are saying for them. It turned out that a large part of my work in this series was softening for myself, for my inner wounded child. Through my writing, I was able to soften and listen to what she had to say before sharing it with you. I think the series became better when I stopped worrying about my theme and just starting writing, letting the memories and emotions flow. My hope is that I’ll be able to take what I’ve learned back to my work, to my Alexander Technique students. To help them listen for their inner children and how they manifest in our bodies as well as our minds. Thank you for listening to both of us on this journey.
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