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Thank you – With Gratitude for YOU!

5/29/2019

Dear Friends,

For over 40 years, my life followed the academic calendar. There were three truths that held true:

The beginning of the year is September. School starts after Labor Day.
The year ends with a flurry of concerts and performances in mid-June.
Vacations must be scheduled around school holidays.

Even though I’ve been out of the classroom for a dozen years now, these things still feel true. Numbers one and two are totally out of sync with life in the south, where school ends in May and starts on August 1, but I’m not sure I’ll ever get used to that.

Since I still keep my toe in the academic waters by directing and teaching Kodály at George Mason University every July, and my piano students follow the academic calendar with July and some of August off from taking lessons with me, right now is definitely the “end of the year.”

I’ll be in my studio teaching Alexander Technique lessons (and Piano lessons) through the end of June. If you’ve been wanting to come in for a tune-up lesson, or get started with an introductory lesson to see if you’d really like to plunge in, I’d love to see you for an appointment before I take off for Virginia.

I’ll be back again teaching Alexander Technique the week of August 5, and piano lessons will resume the week of August 19.

Before I go, I want to simply say “Thank you” to all of my students, former students, colleagues and friends for your support this year. It’s been a great pleasure writing my weekly blog series, which kicked off with a bang in January with 21 weekdays of blogging. If you’ve read all of those blogs, bless you! I’ve had some wonderful folks in the studio all year long for Alexander lessons, and the joy of my week has been my Actor’s class that has been meeting on Thursday mornings. YOU are the reason I do what I do. I love practicing what I preach, but it’s so much more fun to share it with others.

After this, the blog will also be taking a summer hiatus from my writing a weekly post. I’m in need of some fresh ideas and inspiration, and I’ll bring that back in September as well. If something incredible pops up that I feel I need to share with you, I certainly will.

In the meantime, stick to principles - stay Aware in the glorious summer weather of all things in nature (including you,) be sure to Pause to notice them and release any tension you’re holding in your neck or elsewhere, and then ask yourself to Direct “forward and up!”

Wishing you a lovely summer,
Robbin Marcus

AT, Kodály and Whole 30! (oh my)

5/14/2019

Every music teacher has their own way of teaching. In my first college music methodology class, it was clear to me that I had a strong attraction to Kodály teaching. I love its clear sequences, and the idea that each concept you teach needs to be prepared before it is presented, and then practiced before you move on. I’ve been at it a long time, long enough to now be the Director of “Kodály at George Mason University,” our annual summer program in Virginia.

Last Monday, wanting to be in better shape for trekking across the George Mason campus in July, I started the Whole 30 Diet. Deep in the middle of food prep for the week, I found myself trying to come up with just the right sequence of foods that I could pre-prepare and have ready to eat. What dinners could I use for lunch the next day? What quantity would I need to prepare to make that happen? What kind of healthy snacks could I make to give myself a break from protein, fat and veggies? It took me a while to plan out and prep food for the entire week, but now having survived week one (and lost 3 pounds!) I can tell you that it was well worth the ease in coming home and having dinner ready in less than thirty minutes each night.

Eating breakfast on Sunday and getting ready to do all that again for this week, it dawned on me – this kind of planning came to me naturally because it was just like Kodály lesson planning!
Whether planning meals for a diet or lessons for my music classroom, I do think in monthly plans. I know what my goals are for the month (losing weight; preparing a musical concept) and in the weekly plans I carefully break down how to get there. I can switch up foods for variety just like I can switch up activities in the classroom. Each day varies that process just a little bit (a different protein; a different song) and for fun I can insert a new (snack; singing game.)

Wow! No wonder I’m enjoying my new diet. I’m losing weight, eating three delicious, nutritious, fresh meals a day and practicing what I preach.

From an Alexander Technique perspective, this realization is all about pausing, becoming aware of correlations between the kind of habitual choices I most like to make and, figuring out how the directions I am used to following in teaching can now apply to my diet. I used to do this kind of meal planning (with less food restrictions) when I was younger, working full time with a child in the house. I don’t think I could have survived without weekly meal prep. In recent years I’d let all of that organization go and have been living more like an Alexander person than a Kodály person. Dinner preparation has often been “Wow – what are we going to eat tonight? I have no idea. Let’s eat out!” That’s lovely and freeing and in the present moment, but it isn’t very healthy. Restaurants offer lot of salt, a lot of sugar, and portions way too large for me that I tended to eat anyway. It was definitely time for a re-boot and a detox.

I know from years of experience (and I’m learning again!) that in the beginning this kind of planning takes time. But once you get started, it gets easier and easier. I wouldn’t teach any other way – and my husband certainly hopes that we won’t eat any other way since he’s getting three square meals on the table every day. Just like the kids loved my Kodály classes, my husband loves the food I’m feeding him now. Healthy, nutritious and fun. A great combination.

Know someone who might be interested in Kodály Music Education training? Check out our Kodály at George Mason University program.

How is Kodály teaching like the Whole 30 Diet?

5/13/2019

Every music teacher has their own way of teaching. Sometimes, it takes us a long time to decide what methodology is right for us. Sometimes, if you’re like me, you know right away. From my first introductory Orff-Kodály-Dalcroze class, it was clear to me that I had a strong attraction to Kodály teaching. I love its clear sequences, and the idea that each concept you teach needs to be prepared before it is presented, and then practiced before you move on. I’ve been at it a long time, long enough to now be the Director of “Kodály at George Mason University,” our annual summer program.

Last Monday, wanting to be in better shape for trekking across the George Mason campus in July, I started the Whole 30 Diet. Deep in the middle of food prep for the week, I found myself trying to come up with just the right sequence of foods that I could pre-prepare and have ready to eat. What dinners could I use for lunch the next day? What quantity would I need to prepare to make that happen? What kind of healthy snacks could I make to give myself a break from protein, fat and veggies? It took me a while to plan out and prep food for the entire week, but now having survived week one (and lost 3 pounds!) I can tell you that it was well worth the ease in coming home and having dinner ready in less than thirty minutes each night.

Eating breakfast on Sunday and getting ready to do all that again for this week, it dawned on me – this kind of planning came to me naturally because it was just like Kodály lesson planning!
Whether planning meals for a diet or lessons for my music classroom, I do think in monthly plans. I know what my goals are for the month (losing weight; preparing re) and in the weekly plans I carefully break down how to get there. I can switch up foods for variety just like I can switch up activities in the classroom. Each day varies that process just a little bit (a different protein; a different song) and for fun I can insert a new (snack; singing game.)

Wow! No wonder I’m enjoying my new diet. I’m losing weight, eating three delicious, nutritious, fresh meals a day and practicing what I preach.

If you’re the kind of person who likes to have a plan, to know where you’re going, to never have to wonder “What am I going to do in class today?” five minutes before the bell rings, then the Kodály method (or maybe the Whole 30) is for you. (Come to think of it, most of the Kodály at George Mason University faculty has been on the Whole 30 at one time or another...)

I’d love to invite you to join us this summer. We’ll give you a great, well-planned education in two weeks of Kodály levels, and model the kind of teaching I’m talking about for you. You’ll go home with a year’s worth of music materials to use in your classroom, some great new games, and a plan for the year – broken down into months, weeks and days. You’ll meet some great new colleagues and join our support system, so that you can have people to ask questions of all year long. We offer credit and non-credit options, and now have a wonderful hybrid-online Master’s program – come for your Kodály levels on campus for three summers, and do all your other coursework online.

I know from years of experience (and I’m learning again!) that in the beginning this kind of planning takes time. But once you get started, it gets easier and easier. I wouldn’t teach any other way – and my husband certainly hopes that we won’t eat any other way since he’s getting three square meals on the table every day. Just like the kids loved my Kodály classes, my husband loves the food I’m feeding him now. Healthy, nutritious and fun. A great combination.

Got questions? I’d love to hear from you. Email me at robbin@robbinmarcusmusic.com.
You can find all the information you need about registering for Kodály at George Mason
(July 15-26) on our website https://masonacademy.gmu.edu/teacher-training/ .
If you’re interested, please sign up for our Facebook page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/KodalyGMU/

Hope to see you in July at GMU!

30-Day Challenges

5/8/2019

I never even considered participating in a 30-day challenge before January of 2019. The idea of trying to do something intensely in front of others in a group for a whole month just intimidated the heck out of me. Since the start of 2019, however, I’ve participated in two. Now I’m embarking on day 3 of challenge three, which might be the most intense yet – the Whole 30 diet.

So, what’s going on with me? I haven’t entirely figured that out yet, but I’m working on it. Maybe it’s the approaching new decade birthday coming up in August? Maybe I’m realizing that if I want to make changes, I’d better start already? Maybe I just need new challenges? It’s probably a bit of all of the above, but I’ll let you know if and when I figure it out.

The first challenge I undertook was the New York Times 30-day Well challenge. It was a short, 10-minute HIIT program, or a relationship activity, or a meditation every day for a month. Friends and I formed a small Facebook group, and we kept each other accountable. Did we always do everything every day? No, but there were days when I put 3 of those HIITs together and did 30 minutes of exercise to make up for the ones I missed. There were also some fun challenges, like creating a date night where you and your partner did something completely new to both of you.

Right in the middle of that started the 21-weekday blog challenge. I wrote about habitual behavior – changing habits, why some habits are valuable, why we need habit in our lives, etc – from my own experiences for a solid month. I did keep up with that for all 30 days – even writing from the waiting room of a surgery center. Phew. I learned a lot about accountability, integrity, and honest writing during that challenge. I certainly got myself more interested in changing my own habits.

Among the things I have noticed examining my own habits is that my sugar cravings have intensified, almost to the point where I can’t say “no.” I need a serious dietary change, as the pounds are packing on and I’ve been feeling lousy. Suddenly, my gym announced a 30-Day Shape Up Challenge. Before I could talk myself out of it, I signed up. On Monday, I started on The Whole 30, a keto-based diet. No dairy, no sugar (!), no grains, no beans. Low carb, high fat. Oh, my. It’s day 3, and my body is detoxing in the most interesting ways. Yesterday, I woke up with an enormous headache (apparently normal) and brain fog set in big time. I couldn’t remember my cell phone number. I walked into work leaving my trunk open, with my purse in it, for 30 minutes. Thankfully everything was still there! I left my credit card at Dancing Goats coffee. I mean, seriously! I am so not that person. And we won’t even talk about how HANGRY I was by 3:00 pm.

The good news is that I’ve got lots of support – this 30-Day Shape Up challenge is happening through my local gym, FITWIT, and there’s a nutritionist on staff helping us out. I have an accountability partner in my regular twice-a-week work out class who’s going through this as well. I have a dear friend who is an old pro at Whole 30 whose shoulder I can cry on. And Dave is at least pretending to do it with me – he’s just thrilled to have breakfast, lunch and dinner made for him every day. Did I mention that I prepped meals all day on Monday?

I suspect that for the next three or four of these blog posts I’ll be examining my habitual behavior yet again as it applies to the 30-Day Shape Up. Stay tuned for adventures in diet, workout, using Alexander Technique like crazy to do both of those well, and what happens to me along the way.

Have you ever undertaken a 30-Day Challenge?
If so, how did that go for you?
What happens to you physically when you think about making changes?
Are you breathing?

What is "Success?"

5/1/2019

“The foundation of greatness is honoring the small things of the present moment,
instead of pursuing the idea of greatness.”
– Eckhart Tolle

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about what it means to be “successful.” There’s so much information out in Cyberspace about “Running a successful business” and “How to get rich” from marketers, but mostly those of us in the small business trenches are working on “Making enough money to live.” Funny, no one ever talks much about that one – most people just want you to dream big about getting rich by following their program.

So, what does it mean to be “successful?” It could mean a number of things. It could be being rich in money. Or, success could be having a full schedule every day. Both of those are nice. Seems like the second one would impact the first one in a positive way, as long as I’m charging people enough money for my services. In my mind, though, making a lot of money is a side benefit and not my number one goal. I’m really the most interested in making enough money to live and judging my personal level of success in other ways. Probably because I understand this model very well.

All my life I’ve been underpaid for my work. I spend a quarter of a century as an elementary school music teacher. In a private school. I made about 2/3 of what my colleagues who taught in public schools made by the end of my career. (Public school teachers are not known for being rich, either.) Yet, I was an extremely successful music teacher by the standards of my profession. I remain nationally known as a clinician for music teachers, I direct a summer institute at George Mason University to train teachers in the Kodály method. My choir sang at the White House, at the opening of the Marine Mammal Pavilion at the National Aquarium in Baltimore, on stage at the Meyerhoff Symphony Hall with the Concert Artists of Baltimore, at Camden Yards, and lots of other places as well. I gave children some amazing musical opportunities over the years. I have directed, sung and played in places I never imagined possible. I never set out to be “great,” but opportunities presented themselves over the years and from a place of being present to them, I moved into some very interesting career choices. I’ve served on national boards for my professional organizations multiple times, met people from all over the world, had some fantastic experiences. What is all of that, if not success?

My children's choir singing at the White House, Washington, DC in December, 1998.

Moving into my second career as an Alexander Technique teacher was quite a shift. Suddenly, as a beginning teacher in a new field, the world was not going to come to my door to find me anymore. I became responsible for my own income. No one told me I was going to have to learn to market. Talk about on the job learning! Building a small business is not for sissies.

When you start looking, there are all kinds of marketing techniques out there. “Choose a niche.” “Don’t choose a niche.” “Create a funnel.” “Create a referral network.” You can pay a lot of money to learn them, too. None of those ever appealed to me, until I met Megan Macedo and her idea of “Telling your story.” I’ve been playing with this for about a year now. I’m building a body of work in writing, which greatly appeals to me as a creative person. My name is getting out there in a different field. I’m enjoying myself while giving play to my creative expression. I get to be present, to really think through my ideas, to write in a style that is right for me. It’s a codification of what I stand for as an Alexander Technique teacher, a music teacher, a pianist, and most fundamentally as an artist.

Ultimately, my idea of success lies in fulfillment of artistic creativity. Every Alexander lesson I teach is an exercise in improvisation, in creativity, in listening to and working in harmony with my students. Only by being present to them can I work this way. It’s just like making music and it’s what I love to do.

Would I like to be paid more? Sure, I would. Mostly, what I’d like to have are additional students so I get to share this experience more often.

What is your definition of “success?”
Do you feel successful and fulfilled in your career? Why or why not?
What is your creative outlet?

Weeds Lead, Flowers Follow?

4/24/2019

It’s gardening time in the Southern part of the USA. Just pre-mosquitos, humidity still relatively low, temperatures in the 70s and low 80s. Perfection time for all things plant-related. We’ve had a ton of rain in Atlanta this season, so weeding is easier than it will be next month. Thus, I have spent the better part of the last couple of weeks looking down at the ground. I know all too well that the weeds are a powerful stimulus for me. It’s very easy to get my eyes and literally my head sucked down to the ground as I finagle around trying to find those last bits of root. There really is some truth to the statement that if it comes out of the ground easily, it’s a desirable plant - if you can’t budge it, it’s a weed.

If the ground is too wet to sit or kneel on comfortably I’ve got to stand up and bend over. Or, sometimes I’m on my way to the car and a weed jumps out at me. When that happens, I usually bend over without giving it a whole lot of thought and yank the offender out of the garden bed. Weeding from a standing position changes everything, and usually not for the better.

Recently I’ve been consciously putting some of my attention out there on the Alexander Technique concept of “Head lead, body follow.” I find when I pay attention to my use according to this model, I’m less sore the next day in my neck, shoulders and low back. You may ask, “What is head lead, body follow?” Unlike a lot of Alexander Technique jargon, this one means exactly what it says. Our heads weigh about ten pounds. They are heavy! The way we tilt our heads is the way the rest of the body follows behind, because the head sits on top of the spine, which connects the entire torso from head to pelvis. Try it yourself. Walk around, and then tilt your head over to the left or the right. What happens? Tilt your head backwards. Do you want to walk that way, instead? Now stop walking. Tilt your head forward like you are looking for a weed. What happens?

Here’s another thing to think about – when you tried this experiment, what part of your head always went first in the direction you asked it to go? In Alexander Technique, the answer is the crown of your head. That’s on the top of your head – where the fontanel is on a baby’s head. Put a finger there and repeat your experiment. See how the crown of the head actually goes first? That’s because the crown of the head is just above the top of your spine. Sure, there’s a brain in the way – but – imagine that because the spine is pointing up to that part of your head, the crown is leading you.

Maybe it's easier to see in the screen shot above, when the skeleton is on all fours? Check out the entire meme here

I find that for me, it’s easy to feel the crown of my head leading when I’m playing around tilting my head in various directions. It’s less easy when I’m upright and walking. I used to think that my eyes led me everywhere. (I think I used to walk like it was my nose, or my chin leading my forward. Look around – you’ll see people moving like this.) Thanks to my Alexander training, I can imagine that my head is a unified whole – having a back as well as a front. I can imagine my whole head, happily riding on top of my spine, getting somewhere all at the same time when I use the crown of my head to get me there.

How does this help me with weeding? I can choose to look down from the place where my head balances on top of my spine, instead of bringing my eyes closer to the ground by drooping my head. I can squat when I weed, which puts me in the optimal position for a good head/neck relationship. If I do this instead of bending at the waist, all of me will say “thank you” the next day. Some days I can’t do a full squat, so getting into Monkey and at least bending my knees to fold over my thighs helps a lot.

If you garden, try some of these ideas next time you’re out there, and then tell me what you think!

The peonies are blooming, and my husband Dave Marcus took these fabulous photos with his new camera. Enjoy!

Having A Good Slump

4/16/2019

Here’s a few photos from the Country Dance and Song Society National Board meeting last week in Massachusetts. I got up at 3:00 am to get there on time. I thought I might write a blog post on the plane, but I slept instead...
I’m in the upper right corner of the “board at work” photo. Do you notice my lack of laptop? The third and fourth photos tell you what’s going on right now....

I owe you an apology and a blog post or two...
Which I promise will be published as soon as:

My Mac returns from having a brand new battery installed, hopefully by the weekend.
I restore the machine from my back up. (Fingers crossed!)

Believe me, this long adventure has already given me lots to write about, but typing and formatting on my iPad are no fun. Thanks for sticking with me.

All the best,

Robbin

Jargon-busting with Robbin - "End Gaining"

4/2/2019

I went to Austin, Texas this past weekend for a fantastic workshop on business writing. I’ve been looking forward to it for months, hooked into going the minute the wonderful facilitator promised that in this particular class she’d be giving us “The Rules.” I like rules. Always have, always will. Rules give us a framework – a structure, a box (if you will) from which we can eventually escape. You can’t improvise in music or anything else if you don’t know the rules and how to follow them. I was really excited to get her writing rules, because I knew they'd be incredibly helpful for all the blogging I've been doing lately.

Our class started promptly at 9:00 am. The facilitator outlined the morning and said The Rules would be coming shortly before lunch. Sigh. I came all this way and now I had to wait until mid-morning to get what I wanted? Just at the moment of having that thought, I started laughing. Oh, my, goodness. What kind of terrible Alexander student was I being right now?

Beautiful wildflowers I saw while walking in Austin, Texas - Bluebonnets and primroses

I was perfectly demonstrating the trap defined in the Alexander Technique as “end gaining.” When I say this to students, most people ask me if I meant “end gaming,” but no. The words directly from FM Alexander are “End Gaining.” When we end gain, we want to be at the finish line, getting the thing we want or need, right now. Never mind all that stuff that comes along in the process in the middle.

If I really planned to end gain my way through this workshop, I was going to miss an entire early morning of useful and important stuff. I knew I was perfectly capable of mentally hurrying on and trying to second guess what “The Rules” were going to be, rather than paying attention to what was being said in each moment. On the other hand, I’d payed a nice sum to be in this present moment and hear everything that was said, so I might as well take advantage of what was right in front of me.

I decided to laugh at myself a little more, then pause, then let go of the need to have those rules right now. And guess what happened? In those moments of listening, of hearing something completely new that preceded the giving of the rules, I had a Revelation. The Capital R Revelation that made the entire workshop worth it for me. If I’d been end gaining instead of listening, I might have missed it.

People end gain for all sorts of reasons. I love it when a brand-new student comes into my studio and asks “How many lessons is this going to take until I get it?” That’s end gaining at its finest. I remember once walking down the hall to make some copies in the teacher’s room. I was so busy imagining myself standing in front of the machine, pushing buttons in my mind, that I completely missed the walk down the hall. That’s end gaining. Ever drive somewhere and realize you had no idea how you got there? That’s end gaining, too.

Educators talk a lot about being “goal focused” vs “process oriented” in the classroom. Being goal focused is teaching for the test, or if you’re a music teacher like me, focusing all your assessment on a concert performance. End gaining is what you’re forced to do because it’s all about the outcome. Being process oriented means that it’s less about the final outcome and more about the journey of getting there. Teaching for the love of learning. Feeling free to go off on tangents because the class finds them interesting. You get to the goal and it takes whatever time it takes to get there. It’s the antithesis of end gaining, and the deepest kind of learning. The kind where you have revelations.

Over the years I’ve learned that inhibition is the best antidote to end gaining. When I pause, allow the present moment back into my attention, let go of the need to be somewhere else doing something else and really pay attention, I can allow myself to slow down and breathe. Learning to enjoy the process makes all of life richer.

Breaking Down the Alexander Work - Directions, Part 2

3/27/2019

I’m an Episcopalian. It means a lot to me to have this religious affiliation, but I mostly keep it to myself as a deeply private belief. One of the things I love most about the Episcopal church is the repetition of the liturgy from week to week. Before I became an Episcopalian I used to think that I would find the repetition incredibly boring, but the truth is, it’s very comforting. No matter what is going on in the world, there is a lovely set of words to return to, week after week, day after day, that don’t change. Words that provide comfort, assurance, even easing tensions and pains from daily living.

Alexander’s directions,“Let the neck be free, to let the head go forward and up, to let the back lengthen and widen,to let the knees go forward and away” can have the same effect on me as the liturgy. Because I have had much experience from the hands of Alexander teachers, all I have to do is think these words and I experience comfort, an easing of physical tension, and I sense my place in the physical world. These words bring me home to myself.

As a beginner to the technique, without a lot of experience, these words meant nothing to me. As a teacher, I often hear beginning students ask me “But how do I free my neck?”

In recent years, people have made some adaptations of Alexander's directions to be easier to understand and more accessible without a teacher. I think this is all good. I’m thankful that innovative directions exist and that people are continuing to explore new and effective ways to communicate our work.

Two ways to get out of a chair:
On the left, with the head tipped backwards and pulled down, the direction of motion is towards the floor. No wonder it's so hard to get up!

On the right, the person is directing themselves forward and up out of the chair. You can learn how to do this in an Alexander lesson.

An early adaptation of directions came from Missy Vineyard in her 1997 book “How You Stand, How You Move, How You Live.” Missy came up with the idea of negative directions. Instead of saying “let your neck be free,” the corresponding negative direction would be something like “my neck is not tense.” Negative directions work, but the very inference of the word “negative” is something I really don’t enjoy bringing to my work. I have to say that I have seldom used these in my teaching.

My colleague and friend Jennifer Roig-Francoli, who is a wonderful boundary explorer in the AT world, has created “Freedom Directions.” Instead of all of Alexander’s words, the Freedom Directions simply say this:

·      My neck is free
·      I am free
·      My breathing is free
·      My legs are free

When I use the Freedom Directions, I notice that they give me a lot of space for interpretation of the given moment. In my own teaching, I like to remind students that “directions” can also refer to mental letting go, as well as physical letting go. Often, one informs the other – but using something as simply as “I am free” allows me to let go of whatever is NOT free in my body or my mind.

If the differences between these types of directions intrigues you, there are even more variations out there. You can find links to different kinds of directions on Robert Rickover’s website, Up With Gravity.

In my teaching, I like to use directions that help students to find the ground as well as finding the way “up.” I rather enjoy asking people to direct themselves from their center of gravity, allowing Up to pass through the crown of the head at the same time as allowing Down to go down into the floor. I find this particular helpful for actors, who need to have all of themselves on the stage.

I also like to tell students that directions are what we ask ourselves to do instead – and this asking comes through thinking, not through physical pushing or doing. This kind of directing can be done with virtually anything – a mental task, or a physical one.

Mental directing of what we would like to change in our physicality is an essential part of the Alexander Technique. In any given situation, how we direct and what we direct are up to us.

When Life Gives You Lemons, Inhibit and Direct!

3/20/2019

My clearly stated intention last week was to write a blog post on “new explorations in Alexander Technique directions” today. Well, folks, that’s not happening. Postponed until next week. It’s already 3:45 pm, and this is the first time today I’ve had to sit down and even think about writing, never mind think about writing something that requires quoting and accuracy. Please accept my apologies and know that I will write that post, next week.

What happened today had nothing to do with my usual nemesis, procrastination. I love my inner procrastinator. I have to. She’s not going anywhere. This could have unfolded as exactly my usual situation of choice:
1) I waited until the last minute to do the research I needed,
2) I fooled around playing Words with Friends instead of sitting down to write,
3) I went outside and got lost in the garden and forgot all about it.

But it didn’t.

So what did happen?

Out on Arabia Mountain with my dear friends on Monday.

Let the record show that I did the research I needed last Friday. I wrote down websites, I re-read Missy Vinyard’s book chapter having to do with negative directions, I got started so that all I would have to do today would be to write. I knew that the next few days were packed.

On Saturday, I taught a full day workshop on Alexander Technique and Kodaly music analysis to cello students. Boy was that fun! Boy was that exhausting. On Sunday, I cleaned and organized my house for house guests, who arrived that evening and stayed until this morning. I love these folks, and I haven’t seen them in over a year. I wanted to really be with them, not around them while working from home. Yesterday I did go to the office while they touristed, and in the short time between clients I got two important calls as simultaneously, unexpected visitors showed up to consult with me about renting my studio space.

My guests were scheduled to leave this morning fairly early. They rolled out at noon. I had to teach an afternoon piano lesson. Instead of writing between twelve and two thirty, as I'd planned, I found myself catching up on all the other work things that had been piling up since Monday. No Words With Friends today!

Sometimes, life is just like this.

I could have spent the rest of the afternoon beating myself up. Or, trying to get the promised work done and producing an inferior product, which would have greatly upset my inner perfectionist. Fifteen years ago, I know I would have made one of those choices.

I could have chosen to be very anxious about all of this. I could have worked myself into a tizzy that would have prohibited me from getting even this post done. Believe me, I’ve done that, too.

So – I didn’t get a post done in the morning, I didn’t procrastinate, I didn’t beat myself up, I didn’t get anxious. What I did do was to accept the circumstances and realize that I am doing all I can do. I decided to take the small time I have left today and write a little more about inhibition and its relationship to direction, in order not to miss my deadline and let my subscribers down completely. This, at least, keeps my sense of integrity intact.

When circumstances are completely out of our control, we have all of the choices I mentioned above. And maybe a few more you can think of, if you take the time to pause and consider the choices in front of you. And that’s inhibition and direction in a nutshell, in the real world.

The next time something like this happens to you, I invite you to treat yourself with kindness. Do what you can. Enjoy the time you have with people you love. Know that everything else will get done in its own time (unless you procrastinate.) Oh, and laugh about it. That makes everything better, at least in my world.

Here’s to doing what we can do, staying grounded and in integrity with ourselves, and loving our lives and our friends.

Happy Spring!

Robbin Marcus

I challenged myself to create some new habits around writing from Jan 27 - Feb 25, 2019. For this blog series, Exploring Habits, The Power of Habitual Behavior, I wrote a post every weekday for 21 days. You'll find that entire series here.

An occasional post from me, about stuff that interests me.

Exploring the Power of Habit Blog Series

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